Wondering how to find a therapist for your child? You’re not alone. Many parents aren’t sure where to start—or how to know if the person they’ve found will actually be a good fit. Whether a teacher or family member suggested therapy, or you’ve noticed signs of struggle on your own, these five questions can help you evaluate potential therapists and feel more confident in your choice.
Children and families benefit from therapy for many different reasons. Your preschooler may be struggling to transition to school. Your kindergartener may be having difficulty making and keeping friends. Perhaps your elementary schooler is struggling with attention, focus, or school performance. Or maybe your middle schooler is experiencing feelings of sadness, anxiety, or worry. Whatever brings you to this point, the right therapist can make a meaningful difference.
For many parents, the initial process of selecting a therapist feels daunting. Whether you’ve received names from a friend or are searching through insurance provider lists, you may find yourself scanning bios and still feeling uncertain. Many therapists offer short phone consultations before scheduling—use that time to ask these questions.
1. Who Is Your Child Closest To—and What Do They Have in Common?
Think about the teachers, mentors, coaches, or family members your child is most comfortable around. What adjectives describe them? Patient, warm, nurturing, structured, active, adventurous, playful? These characteristics are good clues for what to look for in a therapist—someone whose style and temperament will resonate with your child.
2. How Does the Therapist Initially Evaluate Presenting Symptoms?
Therapists gather information using a variety of methods, ranging from parent interviews and school observations to questionnaires and standardized assessments. Depending on your child’s age, a therapist may use art and play activities during initial sessions to observe interactions, skills, and themes related to the presenting concerns. It’s worth asking about the methods a potential therapist uses to gather information and guide their recommendations.
3. What Models of Therapy Does the Therapist Provide?
Therapy models range from individual sessions with your child, to dyadic sessions with a parent, to full family sessions. If individual sessions are recommended, ask how the therapist will keep you informed and involved. And if your child is a teen, ask how the therapist balances confidentiality with keeping you connected as a parent.
4. What Theoretical Orientations Does the Therapist Practice?
Theoretical orientations are often mentioned in therapist bios, but you can also ask directly. Examples include cognitive-behavioral (CBT), family systems, psychodynamic, expressive arts, play-based, and humanistic models. These are clues to a therapist’s theory of change and will shape the style of interactions you and your child experience in session. Researching these terms online can help you identify which might be a good fit.
5. How Does the Therapist Decide on a Particular Approach for Your Child?
If a therapist recommends a particular model, feel free to ask why—and what other options might be available. Some parents specifically seek evidence-based therapies, which are treatments backed by research and found effective for specific problems (for example, CBT for anxiety). If this matters to you, ask potential therapists about evidence-based options and their experience using them.
While therapists bring professional expertise, you are the expert on your child and family. These questions are designed to help you become an informed and active collaborator in the treatment process. Good luck with your search—and don’t hesitate to schedule a consultation with our team to discuss your options.
By Ellie Pelc, PsyD, Director of CCY Clinical Services
